I have been struggling with the concept of suffering. How does it relate to the Christian lifestyle? How is it that I suffer, if I do suffer? Is it something physical or is it a "spiritual" suffering? (I don't like talking about the separation of physical and spiritual for fear of falling into some sort of Gnostic dualsim). How does my suffering relate to God and his suffering?
I'm not really sure where to go with this post. To be honest, I don't think that biblical suffering has much to do with a certain person that you don't get a long with or having a broken leg for 6 weeks. I am hoping that the two people who read it will comment with their thoughts. The prophets talked of a suffering Messiah, the One who must come, suffer, and die. Jesus talks about how the Son of Man must suffer to be lifted up. We are to follow Christ and his way. Are we not to assume that suffering will follow? And if it doesn't, am I truly following Christ? Phillipians talks of our imitation of Jesus, who lowered himself to be like us (which if you're God than becoming human is pretty incomprehensible). Upon lowering himself, he then went through ridicule, torture, resentment, and death. And we're to imitate that? Then there are Jesus' words spoken in John: (paraphrased) The World hates you. But it isn't a surprise because the world has hated me first. I am your master. If you truly follow me you will be persecuted as I am persecuted. You will be able to bear it though because I'm giving you a counselor. He will guide you into all truth and you will testify to the salvation and wholeness that I have brought to the world.
So, I am now living pretty comfortably. I live in a pagan nation but they don't care how I live as long as I don't frustrate their ends (which I think as Christians we sometimes need to frustrate). I haven't been thrown in jail (like Martin Luther King, Jr.) and I haven't been tortured (like the Korean missionaries taken hostage by the Taliban). How is it that I am following Jesus? Should suffering be something that we seek, or if we truly follow the way of the Master, is it something that comes? Are we willing to deal with the life of a true Christian?
God suffers. He has to suffer. We not only realize the divine suffering in Jesus but we see his anguish throughout history. Grief, sorrow, and anger are outpourings of His love. Can we truly love without suffering? Jeremiah saw God's heart and wept. Jesus wept over Jerusalem before its destruction longing for the people he loved. Grief gives way to suffering which is a result of love. Paul writes about us being heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ. If God truly suffers because of our brokenness and separation, should we not also suffer by grieving with that same compassionate heart? I would suspect that this type of suffering would work at bringing us to solidarity with the poor, downtrodden, and oppressed people of the world. When I read the gospel account of Jesus, I see his heart associated with this group of people.
These are just simple musings that I've been thinking. Hopefully they will lead to some sort of contemplation, and perhaps some action.
Monday, September 17, 2007
Saturday, September 8, 2007
In-School Suspension
I’m writing this while at work. I have decided to take the year off from school and save in order to afford graduate work next year and the years to follow. In the mean time, I am a substitute teacher in Bourbonnais, Bradley, and Kankakee. I’m at my second day of work. It is only the beginning of the school year, but hopefully this will turn into an every day thing.
Today is weird. I’m at the Bourbonnais Upper Grade School. The school districts are unlike anything I’ve seen before. This school is only grades 7-8. There is another school that is just grades 5-6. All of the middle grade levels in Bourbonnais and Bradley feed into one high school. I am only substituting for grades 5 and above. I did high school last week and today I am in the Upper Grade school.
This is the weirdest position imaginable. I am actually sitting in as the teacher for in-school suspension. I figured that this day would be about 15 kids that would be somewhat hard to control. There are two kids: a seventh grade boy and an eighth grade girl. The office said that this is a large group for this early in the year. Justin got in a fight with a kid who decided not to fight back. Shane is here because she decided she didn’t like her math teacher and walked out of school. A returning field trip saw her out of class and she was caught. Who just walks out? I understand that happening in high school when you are more independent and can drive, but this is eighth grade. I find this somewhat amusing. There cool kids though, and I’ve found that as long as I treat them fairly and with respect they also respect me.
Just a side note, I changed my background picture from Joy and I’s footprints on the beaches in Mexico to a wedding photo of both of us. I started smiling and Shane asked why. I showed her the picture and asked if that was my wife. I smiled and said yes. So she bluntly says, “Oh, I thought you were gay.” She continues to explain that all the in-school suspension teachers are homosexual and she assumed that I was like the others. My first reaction to such a question was a resounding no, followed by a quick thought of whether I actually appear homosexual, and finally to thinking about the audacity to say to her teacher that she thought he was gay. I don’t think I’ve ever come off as gay. I’ve been hit on by a male before, but it was in high school and it was more of a show than an actual attraction. That’s neither here nor there, but part of the happenings of the day.
So my duties today consist of monitoring. They shouldn’t talk, sleep, draw, or do anything that doesn’t relate to school. I walk them to the bathroom and give them 40 minutes for lunch. I sit here and read, write on my blog (except I don’t have the internet so I’m writing it out on a word document), and am listening to Bright Eyes. I played mancala on my computer, did a sudoku puzzle, and read a little from my ESPN magazine. Oh yeah, I’m getting paid for this.
Today is weird. I’m at the Bourbonnais Upper Grade School. The school districts are unlike anything I’ve seen before. This school is only grades 7-8. There is another school that is just grades 5-6. All of the middle grade levels in Bourbonnais and Bradley feed into one high school. I am only substituting for grades 5 and above. I did high school last week and today I am in the Upper Grade school.
This is the weirdest position imaginable. I am actually sitting in as the teacher for in-school suspension. I figured that this day would be about 15 kids that would be somewhat hard to control. There are two kids: a seventh grade boy and an eighth grade girl. The office said that this is a large group for this early in the year. Justin got in a fight with a kid who decided not to fight back. Shane is here because she decided she didn’t like her math teacher and walked out of school. A returning field trip saw her out of class and she was caught. Who just walks out? I understand that happening in high school when you are more independent and can drive, but this is eighth grade. I find this somewhat amusing. There cool kids though, and I’ve found that as long as I treat them fairly and with respect they also respect me.
Just a side note, I changed my background picture from Joy and I’s footprints on the beaches in Mexico to a wedding photo of both of us. I started smiling and Shane asked why. I showed her the picture and asked if that was my wife. I smiled and said yes. So she bluntly says, “Oh, I thought you were gay.” She continues to explain that all the in-school suspension teachers are homosexual and she assumed that I was like the others. My first reaction to such a question was a resounding no, followed by a quick thought of whether I actually appear homosexual, and finally to thinking about the audacity to say to her teacher that she thought he was gay. I don’t think I’ve ever come off as gay. I’ve been hit on by a male before, but it was in high school and it was more of a show than an actual attraction. That’s neither here nor there, but part of the happenings of the day.
So my duties today consist of monitoring. They shouldn’t talk, sleep, draw, or do anything that doesn’t relate to school. I walk them to the bathroom and give them 40 minutes for lunch. I sit here and read, write on my blog (except I don’t have the internet so I’m writing it out on a word document), and am listening to Bright Eyes. I played mancala on my computer, did a sudoku puzzle, and read a little from my ESPN magazine. Oh yeah, I’m getting paid for this.
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